Are there really any differences between Fetish and Kink? Do both these words mean the same thing to some people?
Let’s start with the wiki definition of each word.
‘Fetish’ – this is an extreme devotion to something (usually an object) and the term can be used both sexually and non sexually, with both indicating an obsessive interest.
‘Kink’ – is the use of non-conventional sexual practices, concepts or fantasies. The word derives from the idea of a ‘bend’ in one’s sexual behaviour. In other words, anything that is considered to be ‘non-vanilla’.
So you could say that the guy who comes to worship my feet every week has a kink, and his fetish is my feet.
Normalization of Kinks and Fetishism
Previously, a fetish was something you didn’t hear about very often and when you did, it usually involved S&M or similar. Some parts of society even believed that people who had a fetish were abnormal and should seek treatment for their perversity.
Nowadays, it’s almost gone full circle with the suggestion that if you don’t have a bit of fun and ‘kink’ in your sexual relationship, you might have a problem.
Being open and discussing our sex lives has produced a whole new breed of people who are willing to accept things more readily. Understanding that being sexually motivated by a pair of rubber gloves is not that different to being turned on by stockings and suspenders, has provided society with a way of breaking with tradition. Much the same as being sexually attracted to large breasts is for some the ultimate, whereas others prefer small feet.
Kink on Display
One of the most obvious signs that kinks and fetish are becoming normalised in today’s society are the amount of retail outlets relating to Sex and Play. They even appear in our high streets and shopping centres for all to see.
Admittedly, the shop window caters for more traditional tastes in moderately sexy clothing, the further into the shop you go, the products become more kink related. Friendly assistants on hand to help you with your latest wand upgrade, to explain the newest line in bondage gear, treating the products as normal every-day purchases.
Women benefit from this the most, as it’s opened a whole new array of purchasing power to them, where they no longer have to visit sex shops or order their secret items secretly online.
In a world where almost everything has been seen, there seems to be very little left to surprise us, which leaves us wondering is there ever going to be anything new?
Personally, I think that the current trends for sexual openness have allowed us to look at kinks and fetishes for what they really mean. Not something seedy, involving only people who needed some kind of therapy but something to actually be celebrated in today’s more open society.
People do however love labels and the ability to package everything in its own little box has become an obsessive part of the world today. Nowadays if you mention the word kink or fetish, you’ll be reeling off descriptive words to describe them from now until dawn.
If you’re trying to add tags to your profile, the list could be very long indeed. Perhaps it’s better to now say the things you don’t like or won’t deal with!
Keeping it Private
In saying that, if you’re not a cam model or content creator, you might want to keep your kinks list to yourself. There’s absolutely nothing wrong in keeping your private life private and only sharing your most sexually motivating thoughts with your partner, after all – each to their own!
Love Carla x